All posts tagged: being a mum

Loneliness of Motherhood

Having young children is not all about coffee shops and idle chatter. It is not a holiday. It can be one of the toughest times in a woman’s life. The loneliness can be torture. With your first child, the learning curve is steep – learning to keep a baby settled, soothed and alive while recovering from pregnancy, birth and unrealistic expectations of how motherhood would be. We are often sleep deprived, in need of supportive mum friends and it can feel like we are on our own with the day-to-day responsibilities of looking after our baby. In our society mothers are often judged, with unreal expectations stacked against them and their children. It can be a hard slog. When you become a mother it doesn’t matter what job you do, how old you are or how much you spent in Mothercare preparing for your baby’s arrival – you have a baby to look after and it can knock your confidence when they cry, need a poo, won’t sleep and won’t settle anywhere but in your …

An observation on tiredness, juggling & being happy

God, I’m tired – this is nothing spectacular or special, most of us are tired and I’m sure we are all tired of being tired. This is not a whinge, just an observation on being busy. I just don’t have the time and the energy to do everything I want to do. On the whole I am incredibly happy – I do what I love, I live with people I love, I spend time with people I love and I am grateful for all of this and for health, for laughter and for my ability to enjoy cheap wine. But the tiredness and the endless juggling is real. Some days I feel like I am doing it all brilliantly, I am on top of the load and on other days – like today – I feel like I am falling short. I want to achieve more at work, to develop my little business but I have washing to do & floors to clean, kids to enjoy before they grow up and bugger off, a husband …

What’s Mother Cuppa all about?

MOTHER CUPPA is a weekly group with conversation, discussion, support and reassurance for mums with babies This is a small, friendly group for mums on maternity leave. It is about providing a comfortable and safe space for you to meet, to ease any isolation and to ask questions as you find your feet with your new baby, or as you adjust to different challenges. Discussions can include a range of issues… recovery from birth sleep & exhaustion feeding growth spurts what’s normal being a mum low mood & anxiety how tough it can be how bloody brilliant it can be how amazing you are! This little group is all about a warm welcome, a cosy and safe space with conversation and endless tea, cake and fresh coffee for parents from across Newcastle and Tyneside. It is a comfortable and relaxing group to come to if you are feeling overwhelmed or tired, if you are finding your feet with your new baby and if you would like some good support throughout the first year with your baby. Who am I? I am Janine …

Parent Voices: Enjoy Every Minute?

As my bump grew bigger and the start of maternity leave loomed, I began to hear it from acquaintances, friends and strangers: ‘Enjoy every minute’ It was as innocuous as all the other pregnancy small talk, and I didn’t think much of it as they waved me off towards motherhood with those three little words. I certainly wasn’t ‘enjoying every minute’ of pregnancy, but I was really looking forward to meeting the baby and enjoying every minute of this new adventure. Birth was swift and uncomplicated. Not something I enjoyed every minute of – but a positive experience nonetheless. Euphoria hit before the cord was even cut. This was amazing – I really was enjoying every minute, just like they promised. I was enjoying getting to know this new and mysterious creature; gazing at him; cuddling him; sharing the news. Despite the aches and pains and bleeding, I was even enjoying my post-partum body. I marvelled at what it had just done, and promised never to be critical about its wobbly bits and stretch marks. …

family newcastle and tyneside

Being a mum

This is something I write about every now and then – so much of my work is with new mums and I am also a mum who rides the ever changing challenges of motherhood. I remember the early days and weeks with my first baby – the terror I felt at the pressure to get this right, to keep her alive and how overwhelmed I was by the feeling of being ill-equipped to look after my baby. I loved her but I don’t remember feeling comfortable and confident looking after her for about 3 months – I just felt lost. In the early weeks, it was the most isolating experience of my life – everyone else seemed to have answers, everyone else seemed to have babies who slept, everyone else seemed less afraid than me. At times, I felt useless and incapable. And because I was finding it so hard, I felt guilty, like I wasn’t a good enough mum because surely no-one else was struggling? But slowly my confidence did build and I started …